Merciless? Who, me?

I don't do cutthroat very well. By that, I mean I generally enjoy things (at least slightly) less when I know someone else had to suffer for me to get what I wanted. (This does not apply to situations involving couch covers. I have no problem being content with mine even if it causes my husband mild trauma.) I feel guilty bumping people back to Start in games like Sorry and Trouble, so it naturally follows that I am TERRIBLE at Monopoly.

Don't get me wrong - I like to win. I just feel guilty taking away other people's accomplishments (or money). Scrabble, for example, is ideal. You don't delete anyone's words or kick their letters off the board and everyone gets to stay in the game; someone just has a higher score at the end.

Anywho, my first experience playing Monopoly with Steve was on a double date with a friend of his. I lost all my money and what little (if any, I don't honestly remember) property I had managed to accumulate in what must have been a record amount of time. Apparently, our relationship comfort level had not yet reached the point where Steve could mock me for my miserable effort, so he quietly tried to give me some of his property and money to help me save face and stay in the game. He didn't make that mistake again. Pity Monopoly money? Please.

Since our initial Monopoly adventure, we have purchased the Speed Die version to make the slaughterings less drawn-out and painful, but the rest of our Monopoly experiences have been similar...(dramatic pause)...until last night.

That's right folks. On Tuesday, December 9, 2008, for quite possibly the first time ever, I WON Monopoly (I won at Monopoly? I'm not really sure what the grammatically correct way to say that is). In a game of four players, I managed to heartlessly take everyone's cash, force them to mortgage everything they owned, and then ridiculously overcharge them for vacations on Pennsylvania Avenue. And I loved every minute of it. In fact, there may or may not have been a bit of sass on my part as I took my husband's last $20 bill.

Oh and hun? Remember how you stopped playing Scrabble with me after you beat me one game? I think I understand now. And I just might be done with Monopoly - I think I'll quit while I'm ahead ;)